Sex and relationships

I was watching Joe millionaire starring a young American cowboy who is supposedly worth $80 million. In this 'reality' show, he is to select an European lady for his wife. When the ladies realised that he was a cowboy, they scoffed at the idea and some said it must be a joke. They were not interested in knowing him at all. Later, it was revealed to them that he inherited $80 million from his uncle's Trust Fund. When they heard the news, their eyes widened and they started talking about him. They were now eager to meet him! Some said they were keen now because they would never dream of meeting anyone so rich. Another said it would get her out of poverty. One of the ladies revealed that she would like him to buy her all that she wanted. When the cowboy met them, he was impressed with their physical beauty. I guess that is the only thing one will notice on a first date. When he was about to leave, they asked him why not stay with them and have some "fun"? I was totally stunned by what I saw. These girls were willing to get physical and sleep with him even though they hardly know anything about him beyond the $80 million which he, in truth, did not inherit!

Can one actually have great physical connection without a relationship? They hardly know anything about what he thinks, his character or his goals (financial, family and marriage) and yet they are willing to go all the way to get him. I think these girls are a sample of the norm in modern society. If men were attracted to physical attributes in the first instance, then I hardly think I have any chance should I join the competition..LOL.

Obviously one can have sex without a relationship. That is why prostitutes are still in business. It is your choice. But is it satisfying? Is that what an individual truly wants?

In a relationship, I do not deny the need for physical connection. But it does not mean you have to go all the way before you even established a good relationship with your partner. I explained in my earlier entry that everyone is searching for their soulmate. The first thing to do is to find the mental and emotional connection. Once that is complete, you can move on to physical connection. Jumping the gun here only makes your search for your soulmate harder and longer.

For the women, they lose their focus when they get physically involved. Once they get physically intimate with a man, their biological clock just ticks faster. They want a relationship even though that person may not be compatible and is not their soulmate. They will stop evaluating the mental and emotional chemistry between them. They start chasing their men, pressure them to settle down and they sabotage their relationships when men lose their interests in them. In this case, women lose the game. Have you ever tried jumping the queue and notice that you will eventually be standing at the back of the line again? The same thing goes for love, if we get physical too quickly, we end up embarking on our search for our soulmate all over again.

In the case of men, surely you want a woman not a girl in your life. A woman is a lady who is self-assured, has her own ideals, aspirations and confidence which you admire. Such a women is definitely in no hurry to get herself laid. If she does not find the man worthy of her, there is nothing wrong with her. She continues to be on strike! If you are truly searching for your soulmate, you should be careful with girls who use physical gratification as a tool to get you to lose that focus.

Take this American Cowboy for example. He may find mind-blowing sex with these french girls even though he does not have a relationship with any of them, but he isn't going to find his soulmate in this manner. He will not be spiritually satisfied. This shows that mind-blowing sex can exist before a relationship, but you need a good relationship to feel spiritual during sex. It is not just an animal act, it is a spiritual connection between two soulmates.

These girls are only engrossed with staying in the game and outdoing each other. When he made several blunders, they just ignored it and continued to pursue! I think he is going to get more than he bargained for. The poor boy wants to find someone who loves him for who he is, it surely does not look like it is going to happen. Only one girl surprised me, she asked why he chose European women when an eligible bachelor like him could have chosen one in America. This is the exact question I ask those who choose to date me, why me? There are millions of single ladies in Singapore to choose from. I don't think I am that special, so I always tell mum it looks like I have to stay celibate..LOL. I would never get into a relationship if there is no mental chemistry; He has to be clear as to why he chose me over others.

I admire men who have perserverance; the never say die spirit in natural leaders. I have always worked hard for what I aspired to be or do. I expect the same from him. Therefore, if he sought to get himself laid quickly over the arduous task of trying to get to know and pursue me, that's where I have the problem in ticking his box.