Wealth Vs Peace

I met V Yesterday. He is a friend of mine. He has everything that anyone could want. Wealth, status, security and intelligence to see him through life. He apparently is one of the wealthiest individuals in the world below 35. But he is not happy.

I have always thought that financial success would be the answer to all my needs. With it, everything was suppose to come into place. But judging from his life, it made me think twice about what I really want to achieve and what makes me happy. My intention was to stay happy, at peace and be loved. It never occured to me that financial success may hinder my path towards achieving these human needs. Is the bible correct in this aspect?

The path to financial success left him with loads of work, demands from people and the need to secure the livelihood of his employees. People would come to him because he is successful and popular. He told me he lost his friends and he has not seen his parents for a very long time. I could not help notice the tear in his eye as he revealed these to me. At this point, I pondered and wondered if I would ever want to be in his place ?

I realised that relationships were all too important to me. I didn't want just any relationship but genuine ones. V was finding it hard to find genuine relationships. He did not have the time to maintain them as he travels widely. He works until 4am in the morning and probably only has 4 hrs sleep a day. I am beginning to notice work taking its toil on his body, but he pushes on because everyone has expectations on him to be successful. They have practically anchored their success with his presence.

Now he hopes that his company will be public listed and maybe that will dilute the need for him. That way, he can pursue things he really wants in life. I hope he finds the peace and love he yearns for one day. But I am not sure if he can give up his power at work and status and start maintaining some good relationships. For me, I have decided that his path is not one I want to take. Such a life is not only presurrising but meaningless to me. Life is short and we should make the greatest impact on it with our actions. For me, that means helping others and making them smile with my presence and love that I share. Meanwhile, I hope he will oneday find the peace he seeks.

Peace be with you V.

Happiness

The 90s have just passed. What is it that I can be grateful for and proud of? Well, I have achieved my masters, picked up knowledge in real estate, finance, tax, equities, law, dance and music. I think I have achieved a great deal which I can be happy about. With all this knowledge I hoped to be a happier person. But did I achieve that goal?

I think not. I soon realised that those were not the only things I wanted but I was hoping that they would be means to my happiness. Maybe I am expecting quick results but it would be scary if those were not answers to my prayers for happiness. I need to know if I am heading the wrong direction, then maybe I need a new road map?

Happiness seems to elude me. Sometimes I feel that I can never be happy. Where is all the pressure coming from ? When I reflect upon what I have achieved and what I really want, I realised that my life is still empty. True love was what I sought, but I never found it. Some say, you have to seek it within yourself. But I do love myself, except I need to share it too. However, I wasn't prepared to share it with just anyone.

My expectations of whom I want to be with soon hindered my path to happiness. I know a change of mindset, strategy is probably required. My stubborness has once again overuled common sense. A knowledgeable lady may be attractive to some, but her expectations increases exponentially. This may explain why there are so many successful women in business who are still single.

I hope one day love will find its way to my heart and that one day Happiness will bring me joy.

Single ? What's wrong with that?

My teacher once told me, all livings things have mates. Humans are no exception. The government propaganda for early child birth, your relatives' cynical eyes when they find you single in your 30s, your peers getting married and are expecting their first child. How many times have you heard, " when is your turn coming?". Yes, you have become a conversational piece just because you are single!

Being single is taboo in today's society and singles face loads of societal pressure to get married. We were brought up to think that to be successful, you must study hard, get a good job, marry a good spouse and have a family. I believe everyone, like yours truly, would love to fall in love and settle down with someone "right" for us. Perhaps some were more efficient than others, the rests may have had a tougher time finding their soulmates and they refuse to settle. In this case, staying single is not an option, it is the only thing to do, it is natural.

Is there a soulmate for everyone? Sounds scary if you can't find that soulmate, worse still, you lost him or her to someone else! But hey, judging from the number of marital problems and breakups, I am more convinced that there is definitely someone right for everyone of us. Perhaps love is a department where patience is the key to success. In the meantime, singles really do not have a better thing to do than stay single. Being single allows them to be free and focus on their individual needs. I do not believe in seeking happiness in others. We find that within ourselves. Too many fail to see that and get attached or married for the wrong reasons; they settled.

I am risk averse when it comes to matters of the heart. Getting it right the first time is my intention. I know what I want and I am going to take my time. As long as you are not looking for that perfect person, your time will come. So why rush? My conclusion? Just follow your heart. Meanwhile I am going to continue to smell the roses and sip my coffee.